Between Quinn and the general effects of wintertime, our backyard takes a beating. In an effort to repair that, Joe recently put out some grass seed. I happened to notice one of the spots close to our deck and started watering it. And when I say, l watered it, I mean I poured out excess water whenever I had it. Quinn’s water bowl, the stuff leftover from a spent vase of flowers, any kind of water that was no longer clean enough to be used for other purposes. After a few weeks of doing this multiple times a week, something lovely happened. The grass in that section grew in thick and healthy. It is a beautiful color; a glossy emerald green. It looks so lush it practically begs you to slip off your shoes and stand on it. It’s only a small patch but that makes it no less impressive. Now you may be thinking, well, duh. Grass seed + water = magic. And of course you would be right, but also, I am pretty ham fisted with a learning, so you should probably also expect me to identify a lesson, so just hang on. That lesson is, what you pay attention to, give time and energy to, what you “water,” (literally and figuratively) grows.

But let’s actually apply it. What things are you watering? And are they good or bad?

Some “good watering” would be things like giving your employees opportunities to shine. Or highlighting someone’s best qualities in a conversation they may never know about.

Or are you doing “bad watering?” Are you highly critical of others when there is no real reason to be? Do you refuse to share credit or acknowledge good ideas, no matter who offered them?

While you may have some pretty confident answers for these questions, I would like to offer a thought you might not have considered. Sometimes you don’t really know what you are watering until it grows enough for you to see it. Perhaps you have a new hire you have only spent limited time with and now they seem to be off course. Or maybe you have allowed a project to creep beyond the original scope to where it now seems like you can’t rein it back in. Additionally, sometimes we “water” grass that ends up being artificial. Connecting with people via LinkedIn feels like real networking (and maybe it is, sometimes) but often, it ends up being more about number count and less about actual relationship building.

So, what do I want us to take away from these thoughts?

First, start paying attention to what you are paying attention to. Are you happy with where you are focusing your time and effort? Does it feel valuable?

Next, if you find there’s some area (relationship, task, skill) you would like to water more consistently, get started. Making a habit comes down to repetition and frequency. Do the things you need to do, often.

Finally, assess and adjust; if you are giving effort and it isn’t yielding nicer grass, figure out what is going on. Maybe it’s a bit of inert seed or the ground simply isn’t good. Move on and put your effort where it will be beneficial. If it’s coming along but needs more time or energy, consider if you currently have that to give.

Ultimately, having beautiful grass in any area of your life is down to effort and experimentation. If there’s something you want more of, it’s likely you can get it. Just don’t head outside without your watering can.